Do you Hold on to the Past?

Rhonda Britten Starting Over Jessica 911

Holding on to the Past….

It’s not easy letting go of someone you love. And it is particularly hard when their death is so public, like 9/11.

Jessica’s mother was on the plane that hit the second tower. She was on her way to spend time with her sister who was ill. She was on a mission for love. But instead, anything but a loving act caused her death.

9/11 for Jessica was personal. HER mother died on that plane. HER mother perished. HER mother would no longer be making her favorite dinner or soothing her daughter’s brow. It was HER mother. And when a very personal death is part of a public fever, it’s hard to hang on to your own grief.

It was almost as if her grief was ripped away from her through the force of the thousands upon thousands of tears shed for the 9/11 victims.

I had the honor of working with Jessica in the Starting Over house, an Emmy Award-winning daytime drama that aired for three years. Nothing gave me greater pause than to work with someone who’s very public loss was keeping her stuck inside her own pain.

When I worked with Jessica, 9/11 wasn’t so far away. The world was still in a great amount of pain. But now, with healing and time, it’s time to glean the lessons from the very personal work I did with Jessica.

Perhaps you can find something for yourself here… Perhaps you have done something in a public way or it felt like it was public, that took away your rights – in your mind – to grieve, just as 9/11 did for Jessica. I hope that this exercise will give you the some peace as it did Jessica.

Click on the image to watch Jessica’s story now.

Jessica from Starting Over- 911 Holding on to the Past

For those of you are wondering how sweet Jessica is doing? FABULOUS! AMAZING!  I am so proud!!!

I am honored to say Jessica studied with me after graduating from the Starting Over House and became a Certified Fearless Living Coach. She is living a fantastic life with friends and support and love, doing things she loves and living a life that had only been a dream.

Jessica actually IS Fearless! And I am proud to be one of her teachers.

So please, be sure to watch the video and soak in the lessons that apply to you and your life.

Oh and please let me know in the comments on the blog page if you’d like more videos like this. I want to support you in the way that works best for you. So tell me if videos like this support you….

Your opinions and thoughts matter. So please, share how watching this video could impact your life in the comments section on the blog.

And if watching the video impacted you, please share it with your Facebook page, twitter followers, linkedin connections and pinterest groups.

Thank you for being here.

Tomorrow, I will share another video of Jessica and me and our journey together…

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This was so sad. I was sobbing. I felt the barrier Jessica was expressing in my throat; tightening. Taking my breath away. Taking her life away. The image; the visual image of all those people affected by the 911 attacks. Stunned. So may people affected. Recognizing her and her mom, the love. The heart shaped rocks. Bringing her into her own grief, for her mom. The memory box with boundaries. A symbolic place for Jessica to put boundaries in place to grieve. To be present. To feel her pain. Beautiful. This video was so moving. So inspiring. Thank you.


I love to see you work. I love the video's. I really miss the Starting Over House. I wish it was back on TV. Please continue with the lessons in Video.  I am mentoring a young women who watched her mothers boyfriend shoot and kill her mother and then himself. She ended up in foster care and became an addict. She is in rehab now and I told her about your story and how you saw the same thing. I hope to teach her to be fearless and strong and your videos help. Thank you for what you do. 


That's how I felt when my grandma died, still do today. It was like every time i started to grieve someone would pull the rug out from under me and say no, what about me? I'm sad, you need to help me. It was all how dare you? I felt so guilty grieving i finally just shoved it aside. That makes me sad that I can't have that kind of grieving and after 4 years she was finally buried near her children but not where she should've been. Between lawyers, relatives, and people who just plain shouldn't have been involved, i really missed my chance to really feel her loss. 


YES! Love videos of you Rhonda, and especially since I have never seen Starting Over - really would love to see more clips.


OMG...I agree with Linda, YOU were and are amazing and I too was riveted to this show and I remember the work you did with Jessica.  I saw how much she grew during that time with you and I am so glad to hear that she went on to become a coach too =)  Great job, Rhonda!


Rhonda... you always do the MOST amazing exercises. I was riveted by this during the show years ago, and I'm riveted now. Wow. So healing! xxoo